Monday, May 25, 2009

This is the real deal

It is wrong to continue
wrong, all along wrong
the stressed smiles
dotted with periods of lost abandon
fed nothing for our souls
'cept for false comfort
(others perceive it that way), however
I have been made to face the mirror
it is time to proceed in truth

It feels wrong to continue
Fear and guilt have had their way with me
too many times
I have patched my attitude to cover
the pain; for no good reason
Fear laughs and shows me those
worst case scenarios, the loss of trust
the loss of friends who cannot understand
that I must answer to the truth

Those laughing pictures together
reminders of the good that rains anyway
I wish they represented our souls
rather, are mere ghosts of imperfect intentions
unable to convey the lack
the empty conversations, the lies
the struggle to continue for the sake of others
the maintenance to keep face in the family
who cannot see or expect the truth now

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