86th Street Crosstown Bus

We came to a roaring stop
from depths we climbed
toward daylight bright
jewelry freezing earlobes directly on contact
with the frosty air above
we climbed

The lone violinist cried to us through his strings, binding us together
nobody looks at him; we hear every note
here church steps house those resting on cold granite with cardboard signs pleading
the smell of bagels from the shops cover the smell of the street
mixed together in madness always

Today my short blond prototype is with me
on our secret mission, our favorite thing
no words for that delight I feel when he smiles
no words for how I anticipate these moments
the sidewalk remains solid beneath our steps

Tree vendors and book sellers and coffee wafting
it's Christmas and it's joyous and it's sad all at once
these moments passing our mind
more than we can absorb
beauty and chaos; absence and presence keep us grounded now

Ahead is our destination...
he knows the drill, my son my son
there is the traditional wait at the first stop
there are ladies who shop and nannies with small children
standing next to hipster dudes and overeducated bohemians
riding together today - one fine symphony

We sit in the middle because it's his favorite spot in the bus.

From there it's a blur and the heaving and pushing
we are a people crowded into the very fabric of each other
drowned in languages and conversations not one of them our own
the lights are coming on outside, glorious colors
smells are bad and good and perfumed and smokey
we look out the windows at the parks and the stores and the people who'd rather walk

Eventually the ride is over the journey concludes for now
we get off together and head to a store
or to get something to eat, or whatever, it doesn't matter
the trip went so fast, so gloriously
seeing magic through his eyes every time
this son of mine
86th St, crosstown bus

Scaling The Wall

Scaling the wall
requires that single step
with a bracing effect
supporting that nugget
of inner light
fighting gravity's pull to forget
you're the fly on the wall
seemingly not grounded
upward you climb

Oh my dear lambs
bleating so loudly
skeptical of the dream
fearing possible failure
nor allowing permission to fight
the trail of annihilation
this radical dream you followed blindly
the only way out of the bondage
your mind sweats tears
while disregarding terror
so self created

Few follow their path
mouth's agape instead, staring upward
not believing this utter truth, the real
perception of safety, unfounded
perception of freedom, in chains
perception of duty, a punishment
opportunity to see the other side
beyond the wall of fears
by their own inner voice
denied

Blue Sky

Blue sky daylight
lost in grey skies
too long lingering
the calm after the storm

The sun broke
Still there shadow clutches
like crutches
hiding within comfort of darkness

Bright light spotlight
chasing spiders from
dark hiding places
creating spaces

Blue sky daylight
slowly endears
the shadow that follows
footsteps into space
into light

Coding

Eyes
there they are

Eyes
wherever I think
they are

Eyes
I can't understand
can't comprehend

Eyes
telling me something
I don't know

Eyes
bringing me somewhere
I wanted to go

Eyes

Eyes

Eyes

Bright Blue

I remember some things
the name of a number code
the train I rode
deep into the night knowing
never to see again
your bright blue

Love had a name
some other lifetime
we traveled a road
deep into another life bonding
never to see again
your bright blue

Deep into the night knowing
angels I sent protecting
somehow always sensing
your bright blue

Blessings To A Soul

She cut my heart to ribbons with her words
perhaps to set me free
heart cut to ribbons while she pasted
presumptious poisoned band aids on the wound
Not heeding God in the wind
there to heal me

Why do you avoid the light, my friend?
You think you never avoid it,
but when it shines on the truth as it lays bare between us
you cover it with an embarrassed expression
Forgetting that God gave us light
to see things

Those swirled in the fabric of dogma
their skeletons hid within deep dark cupboards
wound us with their pained manipulations
Twist you to their hateful convictions
Too arrogant to remember God
and every molecule of the truth he sees

I wish I didn't remember your actions
The words carrying hidden disgust makes me sad
Sorry for a heart in dismay, I know
Heaven is here if you'll see it
Thank God for my gross imperfections
My path filled with angels everywhere
I'm lucky to be able to know them
Send you blessings to you
That you see them too

Tree By The Sea

I am a tree
at the edge of the sea
wind is blowing hard
all around me
my roots have dug deep
beyond the sand
grabbing a hold
of the rock beneath land
holding tight

I am a tree
at the edge of this sea
storms blowing hard
through my branches
I can stand strong
standing straight, standing strong
my branches spread wide
reaching up toward the sky

I am a tree
placed close to the sea
I love the water
all around me
sometimes the floods
surround me with doubt
yet I do not drown
I dry out, and calm down
grateful to keep growing

I am a tree
loved by the sea
my branches spread out
far beyond me
the leaves sprout out
then the flowers
lead to fruit
shared with all
my creations

Within2Worlds

Poised between two worlds
The comfort of angels to your right
The devil of change to your left
Nobody knows the path you walk
My friend of the streets
Others cannot know the poetry
Your soul sings

Poised between two worlds
Apart from the daily grind
Communed to the lost and hidden
Cold comfort and sweet abandon
Hold onto your hope however you can
Send out that sweet breath
Your soul sings

When the day brings you salvation
Will your eyes see the road out of here
When another soul can ease your sorrows
Will they see the chance and sieze it
When temptation gives you the nod
Will you know to give it the finger
There is no time except now
To release whatever it is
Your soul sings

Bliss Nirvana Passing

Yellow marigolds smiling
in the night
grey clouds and dinner sounds
these people
never let their children sit still
they run about the beach
their grown up dreams
out of reach
out of reach
daddy uses plastic cards
buys them pizza slices
the wind blows wind past them
past my glasses
casting shadows
This tall streetlight
mimics the sun
while I write this
the sky dimming down
I don't want to leave this
bliss nirvana
don't want to hand over this
tonight tomorrow
crash in the work and the calls
people I don't wanna speak to
only just getting to know myself
through the chaos that
surrounds you

Sound-side

This home place
gliding gulls
dropping clams rocks
familiar crack
shells opening
my shell breaking
likewise

This great sadness
about time
that is lost
already, she'll view me
with disbelief,
much the way that
I fathom her
grandmother spirit
I'm caught
midway
thus

Those marauders
costumed
as believers
once bled life away
stupidly
I ignored words
widening lesions

We love
all wild confusion
that family
muses through
blessed
the whole mess
a gift

Ignorance often
blissful
like a breeze or
a whisper
my heart
a child
who needs
wisps of hair
lovingly brushed
from eyes
drying tears

Clarity

The opera lens clicks to focus…

HD’s view upon the world…

Expectations wound frustration’s glance…

Unleashing the voice and taking the chance…

Screaming.

Perhaps it’s just self-pity, babe…

Perhaps it’s just self loathing.

Perhaps it’s just the way I was trained.

Perhaps I’m saving nothing.

Perhaps.

But if it’s my real you’re wanting, then…

You’d better get in line.

Behind me; I’m still seeking it.

My vein of gold; buried inside.

Burning.

I’m a power shot of something…

I rarely understand.

Got to take your coffee black and strong.

Got to take your coffee black and strong.

To keep the beat; to sing the song.

Always.

I was there all along, babe.

I was swimming in the light.

I was dancing in the darkness, babe.

Trying to get it right.

Trying to get you, right.

Magic Flick of the Tail

There's a little bit of magic
look back over time and you'll see it
wonder to wonderful how we got here
birth and growth and lessons and grace

She's magic for you, that little one
can you see her smile behind those eyes
window watching now having returned to your world
walks by your bed and says hello

Magic awaits us all from here
multiplied by truth and our belief that it's real
magic there all the while though we missed it sometimes
days unfolding with grace; purring approval in your ear

How It Happened

This is how things started
the day death almost found me
somewhere in my soul
there was still more work to do
I was filled with resolve, finally
allowing truth to be truth
within my own mind
germ to the seed that broke its shell

Each step was taken first small and hesitant
with confidence, the strides found me and
choices made themselves; miracles
created new opportunities, friends
encouraged me to grab it, the brass ring
we laughed realizing how
I could have done this all along
the veil over my eyes I had placed there myself

No journey ends without new ones beginning
fear sometimes comes with good ideas, learning
differences between the outworn and the renewed
casting hope out to the universe
whatever it is that can be shared, love
like rain to break the shells of other seeds
carried on the wing; let us all find our songs
let us shed the chains we shackled to ourselves

Standing Firm

The molecules voice
ingrained in everything
lined through leaves; telling a story
explanations coursing the drops
that make up a river
it's course flows in a direction
that strikes fear in our minds
but is known to our spirits anyway
this is the singular path we cared about
explained to us in the map legends
given to us lifetimes ago
Understand, all I know how to do now
is to stand firm in prayer and communication
asking my spirit, just to believe
in a heart's desire that knows so well
what is lined in the leaves
these map legends of time
telling our life's story to us again.